"'At this late hour, you see,' resumed Mr.
Slirr—'Ha! stay. By the most singular good
fortune, my dinner-party comprises exactly
twelve. They will, I am sure, at my request,
suspend politics for five minutes, and form
themselves into a friendly little jury.'

"The good-natured coroner hastened back to
his dining-room, and returned in a minute or so
with the intelligence that everything had been
comfortably arranged; a jocular resolution having
moreover been hastily put and carried, that the
intended perquisition should last no longer than
the new magnum just brought in."

"But, really, my good sir," I interposed at
this point, "your narrative, though of remarkable
interest, is hardly, let me observe, consistent
with those rules of jurisprudence such as, I
faintly remember, prev——"

"Forgive me," interrupted my companion;
"you have probably been absent some time from
this country, and are consequently not smack
aware of the searching and much-needed reforms
that have taken place in our civil and smack
criminal code."

"Proceed, sir, I beg," said I.

"Mr. Slirr kept covenant with his lively jury.
He commenced the proceedings by reminding
them that the real—he had nearly said the only
duty incumbent upon them—was to respect the
feelings of the highly-popular accused: a gentleman
society could ill spare, even for the few hours
they were about to employ in giving a fresh
burnish to his character; so much for that innocent
person. He said, emphatically, 'innocent,' for the
jury knew, as well as he, the coroner, that everybody
was innocent, till, et cetera.—'Pass the claret,
Tipler.'—Secondly, he begged to deprecate most
earnestly the indulgence of any idle curiosity as
to the mere facts of the case, inasmuch as such
a proceeding might savour of an uncourteous
distrust as to the competency of that superior
tribunal which was paid—and very handsomely
paid—for looking into this sort of thing.

"A juryman inquired, amidst some disapprobation,
where was the body upon which they
were, at the moment, allegorically seated?

"Inspector Gimlett informed the court that the
body had not yet come to hand, but that one foot
was confidently expected by the train at eight
forty-five. Other members might follow.

"A short desultory conversation ensued, which
was stopped by the coroner's glancing significantly
at the exhausted magnum, and suggesting
that they had better consider their verdict. They
immediately brought in, Murder.

"'Murder, eh?' said the coroner to the foreman.
'All right, old fellow. There you are'
(he hastily recorded it), 'and here's the thingamy'
(giving the warrant to Mr. Gimlett).
'Dine with me to-morrow, Lovibond, after the
trial? Devonshire mutton.'

"'With the greatest pleasure,' replied Sir
Charles, and, waving a farewell to the jury, withdrew.

"They drove direct to Oldgate.

"Although the apartment into which Sir Charles
was inducted, was, in point of fact, one of the
most luxurious in the prison, it so little satisfied
his fastidious taste, that, after partaking of some
stewed pigeons à la crapandine, and a few glasses
of very tolerable Burgundy, he sent for the
governor, and inquired how long it was probable
he might be detained?

"The governor replied that the usual weekly
assize would be held on Thursday.

"On Thursday! And this was only Monday!
And Sir Charles had engaged himself to dinner
to-morrow! Could nothing be done to accelerate
the dilatory action of the law?

"The governor felt all the hardship of Sir
Charles's position. There was but one remedy
—a royal commission. Good thought! The
Home Secretary was at that very moment a
guest at Windsor. Supposing that the necessary
forms could be gone through, and that the judges
were in town, the trial might take place tomorrow,
at the usual hour. He would at once
set the telegraph at work.

"The amiable and zealous governor was as
good as his word, and such success attended his
well-meant efforts, that everything was settled,
the bill was found, and the commission was
opened by ten o'clock on the following morning.

"The prisoner, who had passed an excellent
night, rose in high good humour, and dressed
himself with unusual care. The papers of the
previous evening, in second, third, and even
fourth editions, had made this remarkable case
so widely known, that, long before the opening
of the doors, crowds besieged the different
entrances.

"The judges (Squall and Rumpus) took their
seats with their accustomed punctuality.

"Counsel for the prosecution, learned Attorney-
General, assisted by Mr. Bullseye, Q.C., and Mr.
Owdyce. Part of the prisoner—Mr. Serjeant
Calantine, and Mr. Egbert Bee.

"Mr. Bullseye apologised for the absence of
his leader, who was engaged in nine other cases
of equal importance with that now about to be
submitted to their ludships. He himself had
been engaged (at whist) till near six o'clock that
morning, but had had abundant opportunity,
during breakfast, to look into the case, and found
himself in a position to lay five to four with the
learned judge (Rumpus) that he landed a verdict
safe, before luncheon.

"The court declined the bet, pointing out to
Mr. Bullseye the serious public inconvenience
that might ensue, should the example be so
extensively followed by the prisoner, jury, and
others, as to call for the establishment of a
regular ring, before the commencement of each
case.

"Mr. Bullseye bowed acquiescence, and, resuming
his address, called upon the jury to banish
from their minds all idea of the case before them.
(Three jurors pocketed their fourth editions—
three others made a hasty note of the learned