everybody who has had an opportunity of comparing
the two knows to be well deserved.

Among the social peculiarities which afford
perennial food to the local Punch are those connected
with marriage, which, it must be admitted,
is rather a rapid process in India, where
people have seldom time for long engagements,
and where single ladies — in the provinces at any
rate — are so scarce as to be caught up with
celerity. In India, however, as elsewhere, it is
not every spinster (or " spin," as she is called
in that irreverent country) who can afford to
tamper very long with her admirers, or rely too
literally on the assertion of Mrs. Peachum in
the Beggar's Opera, that by keeping men off
you keep them on. One of the saddest satires
in the collection before me is a series of
drawings descriptive of " The Spinster —her
Progress," from the time when she treats even
"big civilians" with hauteur, down to that when
she is compelled to put up with a penniless
ensign. In illustration of the series, there
is a song in imitation of a well-known original.
It is called " The Song of the Spin," and the first
stanza is as follows:

With footstep weary and worn,
With eyelids heavy and red,
A lady was seen in a ball-room dress,
Betaking herself to bed.
Flirt —flirt — flirt!
With beauty, but wanting in tin,
This unfortunate damsel, half weeping, half pert,
Thus sang the song of the Spin.

And so on, in a manner which may be imagined,
until we come to —

Flirt — flirt — flirt!
My labour never ends;
And with what reward? An Ensign raw,
Without money, talent, or friends —
A shabby buggy, a worn-out horse,
A hovel, and that is all;
For an ensign's pay, in the present day,
Is unjustifiably small!

Parodies of the same immortal poem are
very plentiful in this volume. It is made
to do duty for all kinds of occasions. One
of the best is " the Song of the Shirk," i.e. one
who shams illness, and makes other excuses
to evade duty. The next most popular poem
for parody is " Locksley Hall." Some of the
parodies are particularly neat, but they are
too professional to be enjoyed by the general
public, and they have sometimes a vigour about
them which might be mistaken for coarseness
— a fault which applies too frequently to
Anglo-Indian comic literature. One of the best
in the present volume describes a batch of cadets
going before "the Board" after their appointments.
It opens in the orthodox manner —

See the youths all onward trooping, handsome,
ugly, short, and tall,
Pressing forward, pressing forward, to the street
of Leadenhall.

As a general rule, I find that subjects popular
in the London Punch are very punctually taken
up and adapted to Indian manners. Thus we
have "Mr. Pips, his Diary," drawings and descriptions
both on the model of the original.
Mr. Pips goes to a Nautch, Mr. Pips goes to
a Barra Khana, Mr. Pips goes to a Review,
and Mr. Pips goes everywhere else worth
drawing or writing about. In the same manner
we have the " Dramas of Every-day Life" reproduced
upon the plan of the original papers, and
made the vehicle for a great deal of local satire.
Among the most popular subjects of ridicule in
any form, are those connected with sick leave,
the examination system, the purchase of steps,
committees, the delays of the post-office, patronage,
and courts-martial. In the present
volume I see several bits of sick leave, both
pictorial and literary. In one of the former
a young officer is seated with his feet on
the table, smoking cheroots and drinking
brandy-pauee. The doctor pays him a visit, in
answer to a summons as we may presume, and
the officer asks him to give him a certificate
that he is too sick for duty, and must go for
three months to the Hills. The doctor, however,
is not so pliant as was expected. " What
do you see in my face," he asks, " to make you
suppose that I should sign a false document?"

"Well, you can do as you please," is the
answer; "but if you decline, I must change
my medical attendant." A wicked sarcasm at
the examination system is contained in the
representation of an elderly officer all smiles
and urbanity, described as " the president of the
examining committee when he congratulated
Ensign Green upon having passed so admirable
an examination;" the same officer being portrayed
in a companion portrait in a high state
of disgust, excited by the discovery " that it
wasn't that Green who was such a favourite
with the governor-general."

A great many jokes are got out of the purchasing
of steps: that is to say, the buying out
of officers willing to retire for a consideration, in
order that the rest may get promotion— which
in a seniority service must follow as a matter of
course. The practice has been prohibited from
time to time, but it has been practically winked
at by government, and existed for many years
almost like a regulation of the service. It was
not a little abused, as the younger officers,
down to the junior ensign, were drawn into
subscriptions for the purpose, which they
could ill afford to pay, and from which they
could derive no possible advantage for years;
but in all " smart " regiments it was a rule
that every officer must join in the arrangement,
or be sent to Coventry. When an officer retired,
it followed naturally that only one of
his juniors obtained a positive elevation of
rank, the remainder of them being content
with getting higher on the list. In one sketch
I find the officer who is obtaining the principal
advantage arguing thus: " You see, gentlemen,
that as I get the step this way I am
shut out from getting it in any other; therefore
it is plain that I should be called upon to
pay a smaller proportion than anybody else."