Mr. Smear rose eager to expostulate. "Was
this mutual? Was this like the society of which
they were all members? When a gentleman, in
the very benevolence of his nature, and with an
eye sharpened by that benevolence, detected in
the motives of other gentlemen germs of
excellence of which they themselves were ignorant,
was it wise, was it kind—nay, was it mutual—to
reject and put away this imputation of worth?
Was it judicious in honourable members to deny
the existence of fine motive within them merely
because they were not aware of its existence
themselves?"

The two gentlemen who were the subjects of
this little dispute begged to intimate that their
opinions remained unshaken. They had,
however, no wish to prolong the discussion. Let it
rest. Unless any other gentleman had anything
to say, perhaps it would now be better that the
meeting should dissolve.

I was just about to act on this suggestion,
when, to my great surprise, who should get up
next to address the assembly but our young
friend Mr. Sideways, the profile drawer, a gentleman
who had never once spoken, or in any way
contributed to the amusement of the society,
since he had been a member. This young gentleman
rose very slowly and languidly from his seat,
looking at his last profile with his head on one
side as he did so:

"As personal explanations seemed to be the
order of the evening," he said, "he would take
the opportunity of stating a grievance of his own,
the existence of which was attributable to some
member of the present company. There was
some honourable member," he continued, "who
had contracted the pernicious habit of jogging—
jogging with his leg, a habit always troublesome,
but more especially so in an assembly where
gentlemen were engaged in writing, or—or—
otherwise handling the pen."

Our young friend sat down again quite quietly,
and immediately resumed his favourite occupation.
We all looked rather indignant, and a
marble stillness settled upon all our limbs, such
as seemed to indicate that there was not a man
capable of jogging his leg among us. Mr.
Carpew muttered, without rising from his seat,
"That people whose tongues were so little under
control that they used language for which they
might be fined, had best not be too critical on the
uncontrollable legs of others, and that those who
lived in glass houses should not throw stones."
Another gentleman remarked that the meeting
had altogether been a very disorderly one, and
little calculated to make a favourable impression
on the new member—an expression of opinion in
which I could not help cordially but sorrowfully
coinciding. So I felt that the moment had come
when it would be well for us to break up, and
giving a little tap with my hammer, I intimated,
in the fewest words possible, that the proceedings
of the evening were over.

I took the opportunity, after the meeting was
over, of expostulating with my friend the profile
drawer on what he had done, or rather said, on
the subject of leg-shaking. We were all liable,
I said, to fall into habits of the sort, and
besides, I asked, what particular harm did it do
to him ?

"Why, you see," he answered, "it interferes
so with the—the—profiles."

"Well," I urged, "and suppose you didn't
draw quite so many of them?"

"I must," was his answer. "I don't want to
do it. But I've got into the habit now, and I
can't leave off."

"There!" I said. "Now learn to be
considerate. One man jogs his leg, and another
draws profiles on blotting-paper. Bear and
forbear."

"Well, at all events it wasn't you that jogged,
old boy," he said, laughing.

And indeed it was not. A man must have legs
before he can shake them, and mine were both
cut off in a railway accident.

I have been thus particular in noting the
events of that evening, both because it was the
occasion of my becoming acquainted with the
great C. J. Brogg, and also because it gives me
the opportunity of showing him in the light of a
peace-maker, and of presenting him to the world
at once as a profound reasoner and an ardent
philanthropist.

When our meeting was over, our new member
took me aside to tell me that he had enjoyed the
evening prodigiously. Think of that—
"prodigiously." He had enjoyed himself
prodigiously!

               NEW WORK BY MR. DICKENS.
In Monthly Parts, uniform with the Original Editions of
                 "Pickwick," "Copperfleld," &c.
         Now publishing, PART VII., price 1s., of
                    OUR MUTUAL FRIEND.
                    BY CHARLES DICKENS.
                IN TWENTY MONTHLY PARTS.
          With Illustrations by MARCUS STONE.
    London: CHAPMAN and HALL, 193, Piccadilly.

                                     THE
                  NEW CHRISTMAS NUMBER,
                  MRS. LIRRIPER'S LEGACY,
  Will be ready on the first of December, stitched in a
                    cover, price Fourpence.
                               CONTENTS:
          I. MRS. LIRRIPER RELATES
                      HOW SHE WENT ON, AND WENT OVER.
          II. A PAST LODGER RELATES
                      A WILD LEGEND OF A DOCTOR.
          III. ANOTHER PAST LODGER RELATES
                      HIS EXPERIENCE AS A POOR RELATION.
          IV. ANOTHER PAST LODGER RELATES
                      WHAT LOT HE DREW AT GLUMPER HOUSE.
          V. ANOTHER PAST LODGER RELATES
                      HIS OWN GHOST STORY.
          VI. ANOTHER PAST LODGER RELATES
                      CERTAIN PASSAGES TO HER HUSBAND.
          VII. MRS. LIRRIPER RELATES HOW
                      JEMMY TOPPED UP.