of little Doctor Schnapsgeldt sometimes even
to pronounce their names; partly from the awe
he felt when speaking of such august personages,
and partly from the sheer length of their
titles. There was Seiner Durchlaucht, the
Herr Prinz Donnerblitz, six hundred and
third of that noble family, and possessing the
exact sum of eighty pounds a year to live upon;
which he did in great glory and importance,
finding himself, and having his ribands given
to him. Then there was a terrible old
curmudgeon, one Graf Grab, who was said to be
immensely rich—even perhaps to the amount
of five hundred a year—and the inside of
whose house, still less his knives and forks,
had never been seen by any human eye, save
those of his deaf valet. He always appeared
to wear the same musty old coat, and the
same square-toed, much-enduring boots, to
black which was a mockery. His tenants
brought him eggs and butter, and upon these
he lived in a house as cold, cheerless, and
everlasting-looking as himself. Then there
was Her Excellency the Ex-Grand Mistress
of the Clotheshorses—the first lady in the land
(I have seen little Schnapsgeldt turn quite
pale when he passed her). She was a fat
blossoming sort of body, good-humoured enough,
I dare say, if she could have forgotten her
consequence; but unluckily she was haunted
by the recollection that she was actually
a cousin of the great-granddaughter of a lady
who was supposed to have won the heart of
Adolphus the Fat, and to have managed the
weighty affairs of the kingdom during the
latter part of a reign which was prematurely
cut short by a surfeit of mushrooms. It was
extremely refreshing for me to see the native
good-humour of Her Excellency struggling
with this tremendous recollection; and finally
being so conquered and subdued by it that she
could not, I verily believe, have bent from her
upright and uncomfortable position if her
life depended on it.

Then there was the Commander-in-Chief
of the armies, a fat veteran, whose clothes
were as tight for him as if the end and aim
of all uniform was to make the wearer
uncomfortable, as perhaps it is. There was the
factotum of the All-Highest, a bald round
gentleman of gay and debonnaire manners,
and one of those roguish eyes that make one
wonder how long some men will fancy they
are young, and gallop with loose reins after
the follies of youth long after its graces have
left them.

But, to return to my muttons. A
discerning public will not readily understand
how I and little Schnapsgeldt were ever
admitted into such distinguished
company as that which I have been speaking
of; inasmuch as the order of society in
Germany places men of learning immediately
after boot-blacks in rank. There were, however,
peculiar circumstances. Little Schnapsgeldt
had, among other accomplishments,
what Uncle Sam calls a great "gift" for music;
and as he was a modest little fellow, giving
lessons at half price, he was very extensively
employed among the high aristocracy of the
capital, and I played second fiddle. It
happened that at a party where most of these
notabilities were assembled to talk scandal,
and to drink lukewarm tea with lemon
in it, I met, standing in a doorway and
utterly out of his element, a strange, crack-
brained little fellow; who, I found, believed in
the ologies so as to be quite hot and excitable
when any of them were mentioned; divined
people's characters by their handwriting; and,
after having earnestly solicited permission to
feel my head, shook his own despondingly
when the operation had been concluded, and
seemed to think me a very improper person
indeed.

Perhaps, however, I won on him afterwards;
or, perhaps, he was as utterly extinguished
and snubbed, as men of the kind
usually are when dropped from the clouds
among the young and gay. At all events,
it is certain that our acquaintance so far
ripened into intimacy, that I learned the
following story of the phrenologist, and he
assured me with great disgust that it was a
true one.

"I am an inventor, sir," said the little man,
excitedly; "a great inventor, and a political
economist. Oh, talk to me about political
economy if you like, and I will answer you.
Well, sir, in—but, never mind what year—I
had a great idea; so great indeed that my
head, which you may have remarked is
deficient in the organ of Holding-tightness, had
great difficulty in retaining it. But I did
retain it, sir; I am happy to say that by the
help of pen, ink, and paper, and keeping a
watch over my mind, as I may say, sir, I did
retain it; and by the efforts I then made, and
have since made in this respect, my organ of
Holding-tightness, small as it is, is undoubtedly
larger than it was—a remarkable
phrenological fact."

"So," said I, with a slight yawn, "so!"—
a little exclamation, which is enough to
satisfy the most exacting talker; for it may
be made to bear any meaning whatever,
according to the pronunciation of it—

"So! Do you know if we are likely to have
any supper?"

"Supper? No," replied the inventor, with
a sigh, "the high nobility never give supper;
but as I was saying, I had a great idea; an
idea, sir, of the greatest importance to the
country, I may say to the world. Ah! I see
you are incredulous; you Englishmen always
put up your eyebrows at foreigners, but it is
true."

I hastened to apologize, and tried to get
away in the confusion of bowing that
followed; but it would not do. The man of the
great idea bowed, till I could see he
shaved the back of his head too high up, but
he held me fast by the button of a coat which
I respected, and escape was impossible.