the seat, had the coach window with a little
twist of his body fairly within range; he
charged heavily his wrath-producing tube,
drew a good mouthful of breath, aimed at
the open window and discharged his piece at
random. The shot must have told with
terrible effect. Instantly a head purple with
wrath was thrust out of the window with so
much abruptness that the hat fell out into
the snow, and the coach was stopped that the
guard might pick it up. There was a volley
of words sent back for our volley of peas,
among which came often repeated the significant
question, " Coachman, what school are
those boys going to?" The coach started
again while the coachman made a sound as of
answei'iug, but the cold air soon caused the
offended face to be drawn back. " He has
pulled up the window," said Buttons grinning.
—" Don't get us into trouble," said Phipps to
the coachman. The coachman looked stern,
but I saw that he meant kindness. " I tell
you what," said Buttons, " when we change
horses next I'll tell him I did it and beg his
pardon. I don't care if he cuffs me." We
agreed that nothing could be fairer than that,
and when the coach stopped at the Robin
Hood, and the old gentleman got out and
looked up at us viciously, Buttons — who had
thought twice about the cuffing — spoke an
apology down to him from his seat on the
coach top. " Come down then, you young
rascal, and let me punish you," cried the
gentleman. Buttons began immediately to
get down in a very simple-minded way, but
the old gentleman, when he got down, to the
amazement of us all gave him a shilling and
told him to get up again Pullet cried halves
over Buttous's shilling because the peashooter
had made it, and the peashooter was his;
Buttons agreed readily to that reasoning, and
paid Pullet a sixpence.

When we got to the Robin Hood at Bigglesford,
where there was always a coach dinner
ready in the parlour, we boys scrambled
down, and were in the inn by the time the
coachman had cried out, " Dine here, gentlemen."
Buttons came with us, because we
had teazed him already out of his idea, that
he would sit on the coach while we went in
and eat his sandwiches; that he liked his
sandwiches better, because the bread in them
was home made. Of course, we had argued,
he could eat his sandwiches and dine into the
bargain; it was a pity to go hungry to Millstone
Hall. So we all went in, and were at
work like little old men about the table when
the other passengers joined us. The old
gentleman who had gone into a passion looked at
us very good-humouredly, and as we considered
his behaviour to have been extremely
handsome, we were all anxious to show him
every attention in our power, and to help
him to every thing that we thought good.
"Pea-soup, sir ? " cried Phipps in a minute,
for he had the ladle in his hand. —" Do take
some pea-soup, sir," said Pullet very earnestly,
when the old gentleman grinned and shook
his head. Buttons's face turned black, and
after a throe or two, two boiling geysers of
soup burst out of the corners of his mouth.
I don't know where the joke was, but it
suddenly occurred to us that there was a great
joke in asking the old gentleman to take peasoup,
and we began, all of us, to take secret
opportunities of exploding into laughter
among ourselves, and now and then burst
out, we couldn't help it, in the midst of speaking
to the gentleman. We did our best to
show our good will, however. Phipps tried to
cut out the breast of a fowl for him as an
especial titbit, and as he didn't eat it, and
nobody took any, the fowl was left so sadly
mangled, that the landlord compelled Phipps
to pay an extra shilling for what he called a
wilful destruction of his property. So Phipps
had to pay three-and-sixpence, and we others
half-a-crown a-piece. We had our pocket
money with us, and were capitalists till we
got to Millstone, when our purses would be
given up to Mrs. Pestle and our money given
to us in weekly pence spread over the half-year.
Phipps said, when we were off again,
that if we had got a shilling by the old chap,
we had lost a shilling, and he didn't see why
he should lose it, so he proposed that Pullet
and Buttons should set their gains against it.
Buttons didn't mind, but Pullet did; so
Buttons paid to Phipps his second sixpence,
and a fight was arranged between Phipps and
Pullet for the next morning to adjust the
difference about the other. Young Buttons
I thought afterwards a greater fool than I
had fancied at the time, for as his money
yielded him through the half-year only a
penny a week, he must have had little enough
in his pocket after the dinner had been
paid for.

After another stage or two, the old gentleman
inside restored the balance in his favour,
by bringing out " to warm the boys " a glass
of mulled port wine. We were still under
the invigorating influence of this dose when
the coach got within the familiar range of our
school walks, and presently pulled up at the
gate of Millstone HalL The afternoon was
bitterly cold, so there were only the French
usher and servant man in waiting. As we
got down with heavy hearts, we were all
frightened at the appearance of a lady's head
which popped out of the coach window, and
addressed Monsieur Camille with a fierce
denunciation of our conduct on the journey,
and a request that we might all be flogged.

Monsieur Camille, who only understood
one word in ten, politely approached the
coach window, and listened with attention
while our boxes were being let down from the
coach top. With great courtesy he extended
bis hand to receive the smali collection of
parched peas that she had picked up and
reserved as her witnesses against us. We
did not like Monsieur Camille, and expected
no good at his hands; infinite, therefore, was