would endeavour so to economise his time, as
to make a fifth; and then there would be only
three (with power to add to their number)
wanting to complete the board. The scheme
lay in the compass of a nutshell. The stranger
was asked whether he had any preference as
to bankers; whether he intended to bring
in his own, or any favourite solicitor; and
whether he would be disposed to take an
active part in the management of the
Company? To these questions the stranger gave
highly satisfactory answers. Whereupon Mr.
Rigging, passing his hand with a graceful bow
towards me, expressed the great pleasure he
felt in proposing his excellent friend Mr.
Scripplewick as Secretary pro tem. He
knew (he was so good as to add) that I
should do all in my power to carry out the
views of the directors, and that I should be
found an efficient and intelligent officer. I
was thereupon requested to proceed to the
nearest stationer's shop and purchase a book.
"For," said Mr. Rigging in a highly impressive
tone, "I make it a rule in all business
matters to act from the beginning according
to the strict letter of the law, and with the
most scrupulous exactitude."
The inventor approved of this very
refreshing sentiment, and I invested (out of my
own capital) two shillings and ninepence in a
minute-book. I was at once requested to
draw up a statement of our proceedings.
Accordingly I set forth, that, at a meeting, of
which Ralph Augustus Rigging was
unanimously voted Chairman, it was resolved, nemine
contradicente, that the Company which the
Meeting had been summoned to form, should
be called and designated, and is hereby called
and designated, The Patent Corkscrew
Company. Another resolution fixed its capital
at twenty-five thousand pounds; with the
option—suggested by Mr. Rigging—of
increasing to one hundred thousand pounds,
in two hundred thousand shares of ten
shillings each—one shilling deposit per share.
The next proceeding was to decide who
should be promoters, and what they (the
promoters) should severally claim for their
preliminary trouble, in the shape of
preliminary expenses. Here the experience of
Rigging was of essential service. He
declared that the inventor, in this capacity,
should have allotted to him six thousand free
shares; and that I and Rigging should each
have, as joint promoters, two thousand free
shares. This self-denying arrangement was
adopted; offices were fixed upon; a printer
was appointed; and we proceeded to draw
up the prospectus.
This was a glowing document. It described
a little Dorado within two minutes' walk of
the Stock Exchange. It bristled with figures
exhibiting the number of corkscrews in use
(from well authenticated data) distinguishing
worm screws from barrel screws, and single-
barrelled corkscrews from double-barrelled
corkscrews. It tabulated in separate columns
pocket, pantry, and pic-nic corkscrews. It
dwelt on the importance of the corkscrew
in the abstract, upon its indirect effect on the
happiness of unborn millions; and it concluded
by promising to shareholders dividends of
nineteen per cent, paid quarterly. Rigging read
this effusion to us with marvellous unction;
and it was pleasant to see the glow of expectation
that deepened every moment on the
cheek of the inventor as the reading proceeded.
We wound up our proceedings for that day,
by sending the prospectus to the printer;
and by provisionally registering the Company
at the expense of the inventor; who paid
that five pounds to the Registry-office with
sublime alacrity.
We next devoted our energies to the
formation of a powerful working Board. Every
day we persuaded ourselves that the matter
in hand was very easy: every day Rigging
had reason to believe he would obtain a
first-class name. Time ran on while we ran
after Directors. After seven weeks' severe
labour we booked one gentleman. I
remember well the air of triumph with which
Mr. Rigging lauded the Honourable Chester
Titbury, and produced him in the Board-room.
I remember, too, the promises of support
that gentleman lavished upon us. He would
see his friend Lord Cattegat and make him
join; and if we wanted tip-top trustees, he
would provide them for us. Mr. Rigging told
us, after bowing out the Honourable Mr.
Titbury, that now the formation of the Board
was a matter of certainty; for it would be
easy to get any names to join Titbury.
Indeed, there would be a hot competition
among the wine, cork, and bottle interests for
the honour of serving upon our Board. This
prospect carried us all home, I think, very
comfortably to bed that night. I dreamed
that I was dipping my fingers with a noble
duke into a certain little bowl filled with
sovereigns which was always placed upon
the Board table on Board days.
Rigging used the name of the Honourable
Chester Titbury most discreetly. I was
always hopeful while he had a copy of the
printed prospectus in his pocket with our
first and only name filling up the blank in
manuscript under the head "Directors."
Every day he called on me to report a
new certainty of a new first-rate Director.
Every day he heard something encouraging
from the Stock Exchange. Every day he
was told that all the influential men in the
City had their eyes upon us. Every day I
went to the office flushed with hope; but
every evening returned home jaded and worn
with disappointment. For still Mr. Chester
Titbury was our only Director. But what of
that? Mr. Rigging had heard that "they"
were only holding back, to see how the market
went. At last we resolved to disappoint
and to exclude them (whoever they were).
We accepted some names we had before
declined. We had Mr. Flippy of Camden
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