at Peckham advertised for sale, and my
domestic circle removed to the neighbourhood
most adorned by that aristocracy of whom we
were suddenly called upon to form a part.

Having supplied ourselves with all the
solid necessaries of our position, my wife
(or my lady, I mean), began to look round,
to see what there was of the ornamental that
we had omitted; and the first thing that came
under this class of requirements was a coat
of arms. The order was given to a competent
person; and, after the usual family
inquiries, and a considerable delay, a highly
coloured drawing of our heraldic symbols
was forwarded for inspection. I never had
much admiration for, or knowledge of
heraldry, and my expectations of deriving much
satisfaction from the investigations and
performances of the learned artist engaged, was
very small indeed.

I was, however, scarcely prepared for the
combination of monstrosities which, were
presented to me. There was a shield, which
looked like a cauldron; on the left side was
the drawing of an unwieldy animal meant for
an elephant, leaning with one paw heavily
against the shield, and with the other paw
directing attention to its face, like a showman
exhibiting the great canvas picture outside a
booth at a fair. On the other side was an
animal compounded of the turkey, the
whale, the flying-dragon, the bantam cock,
and the mermaid, with a sting coming out
of its jaws, looking like a long tobacco-pipe.
These were called supporters: the term
"supporters " pleased me very much as applied to
the elephant, who threatened every moment
to overbalance the frail structure, burying the
other curious monster in the ruins. On
the top of the cauldron, called the crest,
were the head of a Hottentot Venus, and
a lively boar tripping it gently on the light
fantastic paw. In the centre of the shield,
or cauldron, were two fat, consequential
birds, name unknown, and three small-tooth
combs; for the artist said he found out (an
excuse no doubt for the enormous charge he
made) that our family had been ennobled in
the dark ages—dark indeed! However, this
last heraldic freak, caused me to question the
artist about the meaning of such highly
fanciful, not to say humorous hieroglyphics,
and I obtained a long account of how I
became entitled to each of the supporters, the
elephant and the compound animal; the
Hottentot Venus and the dancing boar; the two
birds and the three small-tooth combs. Not-
withstanding the explanation, I had not
yet the courage to order the engraving of a
seal, before I consulted my lady.

"Well, my dear," that sensible woman
observed, " it does seem odd, that we should
get such a peculiar coat of arms; but if
you look over a Peerage, you will find
many things quite as strange, and I have
no doubt the artist is quite right."

Acting upon the suggestion of my lady, I
consulted a Peerage, and also one or two
books upon heraldry, and I soon found
myself studying a peculiar alphabet, mainly
consisting of animals and monsters. There were
cockatrices, dragons, mermaids, lions, wiverns,
griffins, griffins' heads, beavers, otters,
effigies of men, crabs, lobsters, crevices, sole-fish,
salmon, dolphins, eels, flies, bees, parrots,
doves, pelicans, martlets, cocks, peacocks,
ravens, turkeys, owls, phœnixes, hawks,
falcons, spread eagles, heads, wings, feathers,
legs, cranes, herons, king-fishers, swans, ducks,
adders, snails, scorpions, grasshoppers, toads
tortoises, emmets, spiders, moles, hares, conies,
greyhounds, dogs, foxes, cats, squirrels, hedgehogs,
wolves, wolves' heads, bears, bears'
heads, tigers, tigers' heads, lions' heads and
paws, unicorns, camels, boars and boars'
heads, stags' heads and bucks' heads, bucks,
harts, hinds, stags, goats, goats' heads, bulls,
whole and in part; elephants, horses, asses,
and death's heads and bones. Then there
were angels, spheres and stars, suns and suns'
rays, moons, crescents, fires and flames, sea,
fountains, rocks, mullets, nebulæ, rainbows,
stones, trees, leaves, escarbuncles, escallop
shells, and pickaxes.

Amongst the monsters more rarely used
were the nepandis or ape-hog—half ape,
half swine; the homocane—half child, half
spaniel; the hamya—a compound of a woman,
a dragon, a lion, a goat, a dog, and a horse;
the dragon-tyger and the dragon-wolf; the
lion wyvern or flying-serpent; the winged
satyr-fish; the cat-fish; the devil-fish; the
ass-bittern; the ram-eagle; the falcon-fish
with a hound's ear; and the wonderful pig of
the ocean.

The application of these ample and curious
materials is worthy of the science. The
crests present every conceivable form of
animal and monster in every attitude of
repose, defiance, meekness, stupidity, pomposity,
friskiness, rage, and fear. The supporters
are sometimes animals and sometimes men,
and the former are generally more intellectual
in appearance than the latter. Some-
times it is a striding unicorn talking loudly
across the cauldron to a frowning lion.
Occasionally it is a conversation between an
indignant tiger and a mild-eyed, melancholy
pelican. Frequently the supporters are two
sturdy angels with fat, solid wings, and short,
thick, earthy legs. Sometimes it is a pair of
indecent giants with clubs, or a couple of
snarling tigers, or a pair of large cats with
heads like bank directors and hind-quarters
shaved like poodles. Sometimes a brace of
respectable master sweeps do duty at the
sides, or a couple of frantic eagles dancing a
wild toe and heel dance. Then animals of
more than doubtful genus point with weak,
idiotic smiles to the figures on the shield,
which are quite in harmony with the crests
and supporters. Moors' heads, ships like
sauce tureens, mallets, bellows, horseshoes,
salmon standing up like raw recruits, helpless