blossom, and sloped down to a gravel-walk
which ran for a score of yards by the brink of
a rock-stemmed river. At the end of the walk
was an arbour ; from it a beautiful view
up the stream of closing woods in the
foreground, and, beyond, of purple mountains.
What a bower that was to dream in, with
half-shut eyes and a cigar just balanced on
lip! The pie-crust was not very good at
the Dove-cot, to be sure, and the rooms were
a little draughty ; but I could have been
happy there for summer after summer. The
Nemesis of my existence, however — the
landlady— rudely dispelled this illusion.
My wife, one morning, wished to speak
with me a moment, as I was writing in my
study. I put away my books and shut up
my desk at once (for I had begun to know by
that time what my dear Ada meant by that
form of expression), and courageously awaited
her communication.
"James," she said, "we must leave this
place at once, and for ever!"
I said, "My love, it is impossible: I have
taken it for three months, and like it exceedingly.
The accommodation is excellent, and
Mrs. Danae is all that can be expected of
her — worth ten thousand of such people as
Mrs. Rubens, and half as cheap again."
"James," whispered Ada, in a voice
trembling with emotion, and a tear gathering in
each of her hazel eyes, "if you do not wish
to see me live disgraced and die
broken-hearted, you must give notice of our leaving
this house immediately. Three times — not
once, nor twice, but three several times—
when I have gone to order dinner in the
kitchen, that abominable woman has called
me 'Miss !' — me, your wife, James ! — she has
called me ' Miss !'"
"Perhaps, dear Ada," I murmured, but
very hopelessly — "perhaps it was a
mistake."
"No, it was not a mistake; and if
you imagine by a heartless pun to—to—
to ——"
Here sobs choked her utterance, and her
victory, of course, was secure.
The Dove-cot, it seems, was such a desirable
abode as to have been bidden for over
our heads ; and Mrs. Danae, although in
other respects a model-lodging letter, was not
proof against a guinea a-week extra rent.
She took, therefore, this decided method of
getting us out of her cottage, and succeeded
on the third day's trial. What she might
have turned out without this temptation—
how obliging, how just, how good-tempered
— is a question that cannot now be solved.
She may have proved smooth and courteous to
the end, and have cut both our throats on the
very last night of our sojourn immediately
after I had settled her account ; or she may
have never got into bad ways, but have
proved the perfectability of her species. Who
can tell ?
I know that Mrs. Williams, of Belle Vue
Villa, whom we next lodged with, had no
intention of proving anything of the sort. She
was the dirtiest woman and the most
talkative I ever knew, with the sole exception,
that is to say, of her eldest daughter ; and
the former cooked for us and the latter
waited at table. I never could keep my eyes
off that young lady's thumb, as it appeared
served up in company with my food upon
those willow-pattern plates. It reached to
about where the bridge comes with the people
fishing on it, and always, if possible, took its
way through the mustard and salt. Then,
the partitions were so thin that, except for
the look of the thing, the kitchen might have
been in the parlour, and we heard the most
horrible secrets concerning our dinners.
" Drat the cat, he's been at the weal again,
Mary ; do cut it round with the knife, or we
shall have Mr. Jones a-swearing away like
anythink ;" or, "Pick it up with your
hands if it have dropped, Mary, and
nobody need be none the wiser, except
ourselves."
We were the wiser, and the sadder for
all this. It was rather cheap living at
Belle Vue, certainly, but it was uncommonly
nasty, and we were obliged to take the
precautions of the most hated tyrants of ancient
times with respect to our food — we lived
upon eggs and bottled beer, and afterwards,
when we grew more systematic, upon potted
meats and fish and prepared chocolate. At
last, Ada appeared at a grand ball with her
white silk bridal dress decorated with
numberless human finger-prints, where Mary
had set her mark while dressing her ; and
we suddenly left Belle Vue and the north for
the seaside.
There was a good view of the sea from
Mrs. Spidaweb's drawing-room floor on the
Marine Parade; but the rent, for the first
time, forbad our taking the whole house.
We had the pas of the other lodgers, and
were permitted to fix our own dinner hour;
but, that once fixed, we were not permitted
to change it. If we rang the bell between
one o'clock, when the dining-room began to feed,
and three o'clock, when the second-floor had
about finished, it was not answered. By this
time our private establishment included a
maid-servant — because we had a baby — and
the miseries of life in lodgings were increased
about threefold. Jemima Ann was frightfully
exclusive, and refused to associate with the
maids-of-all-work. I believe Ada went down
upon her knees to persuade her to take her
meals in the kitchen; and even then she would
sometimes knock at our door in a peculiar
manner, and be found standing outside it with
a specimen of the table d'hote of Mrs.
Spidaweb for us to sympathise with her
upon. There was a pitched battle one day
between this young female and the mistress
of the house, which resulted in the latter
lady's signal discomfiture. I heard a cry
from our faithful retainer of, "Hould the
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